Friday Confessional #8
The weeks are going by quickly and I am so happy because it means I am that much closer to Spring Break.
I'm so ready. I think I'm getting to that point in teaching where the joy just isn't there. My mind only wants to focus on the weekend or the next vacation. That's a post for another time though.
So, on the heels of last week's great post about my weight loss success, this post is about the frustrations that come along the way
I was feeling great about the progress I was making until a seemingly harmless comment from a co-worker completely screwed with my mind.
She jokingly poked fun of my little pudgy belly. Let me tell you, I was wrecked. All I could think of was all the work I still had to do and how little I had accomplished.
Of course I began questioning what was the point of sacrificing all the good stuff like french fries, cookies and cheese if I was still going to be fat.
As much as I would like to say that I am strong and can get over things easily, I am human and very susceptible to the influences of negativity.
When I went out to dinner that night, I had one of those moments when I just let myself go. All I could think was "well if I'm gonna be fat then I should just eat what I want." So I had bread, dessert and hot chocolate.
Honestly though it was so not worth it, well maybe the cheesecake. I woke up this morning with a raging bull of a headache. It feels like I have a hang over but I didn't have any alcohol so my guess is that it's a reaction to all the crap I consumed. Maybe it was the bread or the sweet, I don't know exactly. I still have the headache and nausea. Not fun.
In most situations I don't usually allow the opinions of other people to bother me but because I'm insecure about my weight and it has been a struggle for so long, it is my area of weakness. I'm gonna need to build a bridge right quick and get over it though. This journey is not an easy one and there will be challenges along the way. If I eat cake every time I don't see the progress I want, I'll never get anywhere.
One day at a time. I can only move on and look ahead.
Thanks for reading.